The Cure For Stress

I recently had a wake-up call.  My body was SCREAMING at me:  "You are stressed!  Something is not right!  Pay Attention"!!

But how could that be?  I couldn't read the writing on the wall.  So, my emotions got progressively more strained, and my body started bringing on physical symptoms to show me that my conflicted feelings were not getting resolved.

You see, I had just been offered the chance of a lifetime.  It was the strong possibility of getting in a position where that I had eluded me at an earlier time in my life. I could be involved in a level of making policy and helping my community in the chance of a lifetime!  Of COURSE I should be thrilled, but I had this "gut feeling" every time I thought about the possibility actually coming true.  It wasn't a good feeling.

I tried to think it through, to consider if fear of failure was making me uncomfortable.  I worked hard with all my powerful stress reduction techniques that normally worked so well.  But then I finally realized something.  I was pushing myself to do something that I didn't want to do.  At this point in my life, I have different goals and aspirations.  To take this other position would prevent me from moving forward in the direction that I REALLY wanted to pursue.  As soon as I listened to my heart (which indeed, is my favorite stress relief technique) I heard the reason for my stress and realized the way the relieve my stress.

It is only with the heart that one can see rightly; 

what is essential is invisible to the eye. 

Antoine de Saint-Exupery 

Stress can perform a very important function. It is there to tell us something is wrong.  It was telling me that I wasn't following my heart.  Sure, I could take that offered position, but I would have been following the wrong path for what my needs are now.

Many people do take the wrong road, and end up relying on anxiety meds, drinking, drugs, or even do positive stress reduction techniques.  But the most important lesson I have learned is:  the best way to relieve stress is to make a decision that fits with your heart.  You know it in your heart when you're going in the right direction, and your body won't be giving you painful reminders until you listen!

from the heart,
Lianda

Is Your Body Telling You Something?

I just got off the phone with a friend who shared her journey of trying to deal with a bunch of non-life threatening, but miserable debilitating symptoms.  She has tried going to doctors, massage therapists, alternative care practitioners, nutritionists and psychotherapists.  She reported that she's feeling a little better, but admits that she's on the hunt for yet another type of doctor.

Do you know people like that?  Actually, I was one of them.  I would go from practitioner to another in search of a solution that I agreed with!  No, I didn't want to start medication, no I don't want surgery, no I don't want.....  During this time the aggravation and frustration added to the discomfort of my health problem.

Much of what my diagnosis was about what caused by stress,  AND, it was causing me more STRESS!

The bottom line is; according to the American Institute of Stress 75-90% of all visits to doctors result from stress related disorders!  No, you didn't choose for stress to get you sick, but your body is telling you loud and clear: DEAL WITH THE STRESS!

Now I'm beginning to understand that there are people who say that want the stress to be managed, but for some reasons they actually don't want to do the work to manage the stress.

Maybe they want a quick fix:  like taking a pill to make it go away.  The use of anti-anxiety, anti-depressants, are the fastest selling pharmaceutical medications.  

Maybe they want to ignore it and think it will go away: like vegging out in front of a TV set; or drinking or taking "recreational" drugs until they are in a stupor where they don't have to look at their lives; or eating until they have filled the emptiness in their soul.

Maybe they are actually enjoying the added attention that they are getting from people who are "cutting them a break", giving them sympathy for their terrible situation.  They are worried that if they are no longer a victim they will lose that love.

Maybe they are being "ENABLED" by family or friends, who are actually doing a disservice by not allowing the person to learn from the natural consequences dished out by the universe for people who are not living their lives purposefully.

Maybe they feel like they have to, or must, or should be taking care of the world outside themselves first, and this is what they will naturally suffer because they are such a good person to others. They see themselves as martyrs. This is victim mentality. 

This is tough love I'm telling you.  The worst lies are the ones you tell yourself.  Get over the guilt about what you've been doing up to now.  Have a HONEST heart to heart talk with yourself.  Speak as honestly as if you were talking to God (if you are a believer).  You can even look at yourself in the mirror while you're doing this. If you are not telling the COMPLETE TRUTH to yourself, you will feel it somewhere in your body; your gut, your heart, your shoulders; somewhere the tension will express itself.  You may even see it expressed in your face if you are looking in the mirror.

Throw away the blame at others, the world's situation.  This is about YOU and the choices that you've made based upon what life has dished out for you. There is NO "FAIR".  There is only your attitude.  Only once you are willing to accept this, will you be able to move forward.

The bottom line is: either you want to change, or you don't.  If you truly want to change more than you want what is, YOU WILL SUCCEED.

So, unless YOU are willing to take the first step of emotional management of your perception of and reaction to stress, your doctor is essentially fighting to free you from YOU. So get ready to spend a lot more money on new practitioners, and approaches to deal with your condition.

If you want help with dealing with that stress, and you are willing to do the work that will free you, I'm here to help you with tools that will help you listen to what is in your heart, and to move on with your life, right here, right now.

Wrinkles, Aging & Stress

It is probably next to impossible to determine how much money is being spent in western countries on anti-wrinkle potions, botox, plastic surgery and other methods to disguise our true face.  Other options to reduce the signs of life on our faces are yoga and other exercises for facial muscles.  There are facial exercise devices, electrical stimulation, acupuncture.  Smokers are told that their habit will cause lines around the mouth (is it from the smoke, or the repeated action of sucking on a cigarette?).  We're told to stay out of the sun, get more sleep, drink more water....

The one thing in common that is missing is the answer to wrinkles that we "know in our hearts".  Wrinkles are caused by holding our muscles in a particular expression over time.  Yes, that "old wives tale" is true!  Worry causes tightening of muscles groups in your face that will create lines over time.  Smiling will also create wrinkles - but which ones would you rather have?

So, instead of suggesting that buy a particularly good wrinkle  potion, I'm going to suggest an alternative form of wrinkle prevention.  STOP WORRYING!

"Worrying is like pre-paying a toll for a bridge you may never cross!"

When you pay attention in the moment to your emotions and how you are feeling, close your eyes and focus on where you hold tension in your body.  Most people feel tension in their shoulders.  But this may be the most interesting thing of all:  there is also an expression on your face that shows inner tension, or fear (or any emotion for that matter!).  To me, this is the most interesting thing of all. Research shows that there is a feedback loop: if you hold that expression on your face, the rest of your body responds to that expression and you start feeling the emotion. That means if you smile, you'll FEEL HAPPIER!!!

What does this mean and how can this help us? If you've been responding to events in your life with worry, or tension, look at your face.  Have you habitually been holding this expression on your face?  Do you already have wrinkles that are etched into your face?  Pay attention to the tight feelings in your face.  Then reduce them by focusing on joy, happiness and good memories.  You will feel an immediate change from the tight band across your forehead, the tightening of your eyes to a loosened relaxation in your face.

Yes, by focusing on joy, you change your facial expression, and that has an effect on not only your wrinkles, but on your autonomic nervous system, and your health!  

To learn more about bring emotional well-being, and getting a great side effect of stopping the creation of worry wrinkles, get in touch with me for Heartfelt Stress Relief!

from the heart,

Lianda

Why that Heart & Compass?

You know it in your heart.  When you're upset, worried, anxious, depressed, not sleeping, it's because you're heartsick!

From the beginning of recorded human history, people have referred to the "Heart" as more than just a pump for blood in our bodies.  Did you know that the 1st sign of life in a fetus is a beating heart: and that's BEFORE there's even a brainstem!  We speak of of heart metaphorically in language:  I love you with all my heart, I'm heartbroken, I'm speaking to you from my heart....
Why don't we say: I love you with all my liver, I'm brain-broken, I'm speaking to you from my kidneys?

The fact is, our heart IS our center, and it's been shown to physiologically be the control tower of our bodies.  No, it's not your brain - because you can be brain dead (I'm not being funny here) and your heart goes on beating!  Now that I'm thinking about it, I do know some brain dead people....  but they're politicians!  (ok - now I'm kidding)

So why am I telling you this? Because when you are feeling stress, your heartbeat is disorganized, the rest of the body follows along.  It's like you have your foot on the gas pedal and the brake at the same time.  It's a jerky, and unsafe ride.  That's what happens to our body when we're under stress!
There's a lot of scientific jargon behind how and why this is happening, but I'm assuming that you don't want to read about it now.  The bottom line is: what can you do about it?  How can you make a smooth ride, and have your body's systems following a calm pattern?

That's where I come in with Heartfelt Stress Relief.  I can help you to achieve that state of calm by changing your heart rate variability just by using your heart as a compass, and focusing on appreciation.  Yah, yah you might be saying: "how can you prove to me that  it works?"  You will feel it!  And if you're one of the kind of people like me who need to see proof, I have a biofeedback type of device  that shows you in "real time" - as you're doing this technique that your heart changes, and you WILL feel the difference!

And that translates into less stress, better & deeper sleep, better communication = better relationships, lowered blood pressure, control of uncontrolled eating, eased pain..... and so much more! This has been PROVEN to work - and fast!

If you'd like a demonstration, just write and I'll show you how this can change your life right now.  Why wait? Why become reliant on medication when you have the power to do this for yourself?  Why suffer when you can use your heart as the road map to better health and well-being?  Don't wait, let's have a "heart to heart" talk -

from the heart,
Lianda

Relationship between Stress and Health

FOR A LIMITED TIME ONLY, I AM OFFERING A FREE SESSION 

FOR IMMEDIATE STRESS RELIEF....  

Read below (and then email me to arrange for your appointment)

There is so much that has been written about the relationship of stress and illness.  But truly, we probably all know about that intuitively.  We say things like, “this is making me sick”, describe a situation as a “pain in the neck”, a sad event as “heartbreaking”, and use many other expressions to link our emotional state with our health.  But have you actually looked at your own health to see if you have become sick in times when you have been under the most stress?  

Conversely, have you thought about the effect of being sick during a time “you could least afford it”, and how your fighting illness affected the intensity or duration of your illness? 

Stress creates physical responses in your body with the release of the stress hormone cortisol into your autonomic nervous system.  Cortisol is the culprit in heart disease, diabetes, hypertension, thinning of bones, loss of muscle mass, increase in belly fat, decrease in hair!  According to the American Institute of Stress, 75-90% of all visits to doctors result from stress related disorders!  Accumulated over time habitual stress can depress you, burn you out, make you sick or even kill you!

Have you been told to reduce stress,

tried and seem to be on a treadmill you can’t get off?

Right now, I’m doing an survey to assess the level of personal awareness of the effect of worry, anxiety and or stress on your perceived level of health.  During this short call, participants will be taught a new stress relief technique to experience.  This technique is one that has been rigorously studied in scientific experiments and shown to work quickly and effectively. I will teach you this technique at the end of the survey, and you will feel an immediate relief.  Then you'll be able to practice it on your own and see how it works for you.

Also, helping others is a great way to relieve stress, so know that you'll be helping me as well.  Please email me with your name (first is ok, phone number, time zone, and when it's a good time to call you).  I'll look forward to meeting you during our call!

Thanks from the heart,

Lianda

The Tapping World Summit: Not a Dance!

I have been spending some quality time listening to some of the world's top experts speak about their area of meridian tapping.  What's that?  Some people know the term EFT: Emotional Freedom Technique, and there are other titles for the same process.

I'm only going to give a quick basic answer because you'll be able to listen to recordings of some of the top practitioners explain what it is and how it works.  Pay particular attention to the message from scientist Bruce Lipton, and Joe Vitale, of The Secret.

The most important thing to know is that Meridian Tapping works on the same principle of acupuncture, clearing the meridian paths to allow the flow of better patterns of energy.
Our thoughts produce energy; and self-limiting beliefs can lead to emotional patterns of anxiety, sadness, depression; that in turn can also produce illness in our bodies.

These presentations are invaluable and FREE.  Yes, I said FREE!  You can listen and benefit immediately!  You will be totally amazed by the "stuff" that rises to the surface when you start tapping and releasing old thoughts that you didn't realize existed, and are the foundation by which you live your life, make decisions, see the world.   It is like seeing the bottom of the iceberg.  But, you can banish it with tapping.  Yes, you can!

There's also tapping (Dr. Patricia Carrington) that follows the Law of Attraction.  It's focus is on tapping in the wonderful feeling and reinforcing them, so as to create more like moments.

Enough of my words:  Go listen!  Write and tell me how you've benefitted!

Art Preferences, Opinion and Personal Responsibility

"You're the artist, you decide", some of my clients tell me. I can certainly make decisions about a calligraphy layout that can fit many people's preferences, but I think that everyone must realize that they DO have a preference. Even little children know what colors and kinds of clothes they like to wear. Within any decision, there is room for your personal preference.

It's not about being right or wrong. It's about honoring your unique view of the world. Yes, art can be expressed in countless ways, and to give over that choice to someone else is negating the importance of your vision. Many people say to me "I'm not creative, I don't know what's the best decision; I don't know what I like." But just think about it, if you are buying something for yourself, unless you will not be using or seeing your purchase, it will be part of your life. You might as well put some of yourself into that decision and LEARN about your preferences.

An unexamined life is not worth living.

Socrates, in Plato

Personal choice is one of the most important characteristics of our lives as human beings. Unlike animals that live primarily by instincts, we get to choose our path through life. Whether the choice works out the way we had envisioned or not, and what we tell ourselves about our choices is a determining factor as to how we define our lives: happy, successful, or whatever terms we use. People who have strong self-esteem are willing to take personal responsibility and make choices; and accept and deal with the consequences.

Getting back to art and calligraphy, many times the choice that you are being asked to make is about a decision for a gift. Oftentimes I find people making a choice based upon their own preferences rather than the preference of the person receiving a gift! That's probably not the best way to make a choice for your recipient. Think about THEIR preferences instead! If you don't know, maybe that's an indication you need to learn more about that person! Think about the clothes they wear, the colors they prefer, even their food choices can tell you something about them! You can also ask them questions and find out things about them that make you feel closer to them! It's a great opportunity.  And if you get them a gift that really fits their preferences, they will appreciate it even more!  (that's why I have custom gift choices available on my website)

So here's my latest calligraphy border that I would describe as "Contemporary and Colorful". See if that's something that you like, or get to know your preferences - do you like something more traditional, historical, muted colors, or pastels? Honor your opinions, but don't get stuck and stubborn. Being open to considering other choices is a sign of healthy flexibility. And please, realize that there is no right or wrong - If someone doesn't like this border design, I know, it is THEIR opinion, not a statement about my self-worth! How much better we could all get along if we realized that statements from others are simply their opinion and no reason for disagreement or anger!

So, those are my Words To Live By for now!